Re: Hilarious Quotes/Pictures/Answers ...

OT but very important:

I hope you know this is unethical if really true. We cannot explicitly keep a tracker on such activities, but I'd request your companion to get an account for him/her and spare your account the burden.

BTW, going by what is written above, are you the technical Cleaner passing time in jokes section (seems so going by the interpretation of your sentence) or the hilarious Cleaner?

Re: Hilarious Quotes/Pictures/Answers ...

Probably a split personality you know what I mean?

Re: Hilarious Quotes/Pictures/Answers ...

I always thought only Indian celebrities and politicians are stupid idiots, but as it turns out USA is not far behind us in terms of stupidity. Here are a few quotations from the US politicians.

“Outside of the killings, Washington has one of the lowest crime rates in the country.” - Mayor

“It isn’t pollution that’s harming the environment. It’s the impurities in our air and water that are doing it.” – Vice President

“I love California. I practically grew up in Phoenix.”

“It’s no exaggeration to say that the undecideds could go one way or the other.”

“The word ‘genius’ isn’t applicable in football. A genius is a guy like Norman Einstein.” (He meant Albert Einstein)

“I will make sure that everyone who has a job wants a job.”

“We don’t necessarily discriminate. We simply exclude certain types of people.”

“If we don’t succeed, we run the risk of failure.”

“I think anybody who doesn’t think I’m smart enough to handle the job is misunderestimating.”

“Traditionally, most of Australia’s imports come from overseas.”

“There are known knowns; there are things we know we know. There are known unknowns, that is to say there are things that we know we don’t know. But there are also unknown unknowns. There are things we do not know we don’t know.” - White House Official Seymour Clarity.

And a few from the glamor world.

In answer to the question about living forever, Eva Lasting, a Miss USA contestant replied, “I would not live forever, because we should not live forever, because if we were supposed to live forever, then we would live forever, but we cannot live forever, which is why I would not live forever.”
(Married to her forever might be quite a challenge!)

“Whenever I watch TV and see those poor starving kids all over the world, I can’t help but cry. I mean I would like to be skinny like that, but not with all those flies and death and stuff.”

“Smoking kills. If you’re killed, you’ve lost a very important part of your life.” - actress Ima bewildered, during an interview to become spokesperson for the federal anti-smoking campaign

“I’ve never had major knee surgery on any other part of my body.” - Crash deBoards, University of Kentucky basketball

Re: Hilarious Quotes/Pictures/Answers ...

If Tequila, Vodka, Whiskey, Gin, Rum are called Spirits.

Then those who have it are very Spiritual.

Re: Hilarious Quotes/Pictures/Answers ...

7) Close the window airforce is coming.....LOL...

Sent from my Lenovo P780_ROW using xBhp Connect mobile app

Re: Hilarious Quotes/Pictures/Answers ...

Hehehe...

Sent from my Lenovo P780_ROW using xBhp Connect mobile app

Re: Hilarious Quotes/Pictures/Answers ...

As long as the contents of the Posts are not objectionable ,and is within the Xbhp Forum rules , the member and the account will continue to be Valid

Re: Hilarious Quotes/Pictures/Answers ...

A teacher decides that she is going to teach her second grade class a new word today. She tells them that the word is "definitely" and its meaning is "absolute, positive, without a doubt."
She asks the class if anyone can think of a sentence with the word in it. She calls on little Susan who is in the back raising her hand, quite sure of herself.
Susan stands up and says, "The sky is definitely blue."
The teacher replies to her, "Well, that's a good sentence but sometimes the sky is gray, and sometimes its cloudy, and sometimes its red and pink so the sky is not definitely blue. Anyone else?"
Tom's hand flies up and she calls on him.
Tom answers, "The water is definitely clear."
"Well, Tom that's a good sentence but sometimes the water is muddy, and sometimes it's green, and sometimes it's full of seaweed so it's not definitely clear. Anyone else?"
Finally, in the far corner, little Robert slowly raises his hand.
"Yes, Robert?" asks the teacher.
"Can I ask a question, teacher?" Robert replies.
"Yes."
"Do farts have lumps?"
"No. Why do you ask."
"Well, then I've definitely pooped in my pants.”

Re: Hilarious Quotes/Pictures/Answers ...

TODAY i understood the real purpose of FI !!

Re: Hilarious Quotes/Pictures/Answers ...

Haha

Re: Hilarious Quotes/Pictures/Answers ...



Sent from my XT1033 using xBhp Connect mobile app

Re: Hilarious Quotes/Pictures/Answers ...

soda bike..!! https://www.facebook.com/photo.php?v=429053633804273&fref=nf

Re: Hilarious Quotes/Pictures/Answers ...

Sorry but could not understand a single word in the video.
All I understood was that they are using Soda instead of petrol and bike is still working.
What is Hilarious in that?
And thats why people have been asked to translate posts in English

Re: Hilarious Quotes/Pictures/Answers ...

After the twin tower tragedy, one company invited the remaining members of other companies who had been decimated by the attack on the Twin Towers to share their available office space. At a morning meeting, the head of security told stories of why these people were alive... and all the stories were just:
The 'L I T T L E' things.

#As you might know, the head of the company got in late that day because his son started kindergarten.
#Another fellow was alive because it was his turn to bring donuts and coffee.
#One woman was late because her alarm clock didn't go off in time.
#One was late because of being stuck in a traffic jam because of an auto accident.
#One of them missed his bus.
#One spilled food on her clothes and had to take time to change.
#One's car wouldn't start.
#One went back to answer the telephone.
#One had a child that cried to not go to school and didn't getting him ready took more time than usual.
#One couldn't get a taxi.
#The one that struck me was the man who put on a new pair of shoes that morning, took the various means to get to work but before he got there, he developed a blister on his foot. He stopped at a drugstore to buy a Band-Aid. That is why he is alive today.

Now when you are stuck in traffic, miss an elevator, turn back to answer a ringing telephone. All the little things that annoy you, just think that this is exactly where God wants me to be! at this very moment.

The next time your morning seems to be going wrong, the children are slow getting dressed, you can't seem to find the car keys, you hit every traffic light, don't get mad or frustrated; God is at work watching over you.
May God continue to bless you with all those annoying little things and may you remember their possible purpose.
God Bless. Ride Safe.