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"SaddleSore" There's no logic to why this word excites me
I believe most of you have heard of it or at least come across the name 'Iron Butt Association' (abbreviated as IBA), for those who haven't, to sum it up in simple words, is an organization that appreciates long distance endurance rides and shows its appreciation in the form of handing out certificates to those who have accomplished those feats.I've been hearing about it from the time I joined 'Xbhp' (An online Indian forum for people who share a passion for bikes) back in 2011. And just like anyone else whose just got their hands on their first bike, I too got hooked to the idea of getting on one�s machine and then riding off, not with any particular destination in mind, but just riding on and on for the sake of being at peace with oneself. Being a student did not make things easy and had posed many limitations, some financially and mostly restrictions imposed by family. A short flash back would explain why;
My father was completely against the idea of getting me a bike, and I don�t blame him, because I reside in southern Kerala, where 2 wheeler accidents are common occurrences. But in the end I somehow managed to convince him, and believe me when I say this, I had to cry and crib for months, the original intention was a replacement for our decade old Kinetic Zoom which I fondly refer to as �Kiney�, I had an inclination towards the Bajaj Platina mainly cause of the advertised mileage figures and blah�blah�blah, BUT! I ended up getting a Hero Honda Karizma, which ended up being one of the turning points in my life.
Fast forwarding to 2013, got close with a friend and fellow rider (Sachin Satheesh) from the district of Pathanamthitta whom I met during a G2G ride to Mundanthurai, a likeminded chap who had a similar passion for endless long rides. He was the one who suggested �Kolli Hills� I�ve never heard of the place before and I couldn�t care less, because the idea of riding 1000+ kms almost continuously was like a dream come true for me and I didn�t bother about the details and specifics. An insight on why I was more inclined to do a continuous ride was because of time constraints, and mainly because my family was left out in the dark and as far they knew, I was safe and sound minding my own business in my hostel room at Karunagapally, Kollam. So if I did my business within the time frame of a weekend, then they wouldn�t even know that I was gone, that is as long as I answered their calls and replied to their texts. But believe me folks if you ask me now, without a seconds doubt I�d admit that it was really stupid of me to keep my family in the dark regarding my whereabouts.
So coming back to that day, it was a regular one as far as everyone else was concerned but for me it was special, after college I decided to head straight to Thuckalay, where I�d meet up with Sachin, and I did. Reached there by 10.30pm had a few conversations with him and his roomies, after which he suggested it would be best if we start by midnight since by that time the roads would be nearly empty and we would be able to save some time by doing triple digits without much effort, and he was right. The only stop we made was at a nearby fuel bunk, and then it was riding all the way, that is, till sleepiness started to creep in.
Sachin suggested we take short breaks which by the way, he called �Power Naps�. And we did, thankfully in Tamil Nadu there are small shed like constructions at every bus drop, we stopped, and slept there for exactly 2 minutes, I was a bit sceptical since I�ve seen a lot of movies and I very well knew it was a dream come true for looters, but nothing of that sort happened but just to be safe we slept with our helmets on. I know it sounds stupid and it really was! You should�ve seen Sachin sleeping with all his gears on, but then again I dare you readers to attempt to sleep in a scenario like that without ending up doing something ridiculous, for the sake of personal security.
One such bus drop
Moving on, nearing Namakkal we started to feel tired and that�s when we decided to stop and have something to drink and eat, we had the energy drinks (A big mistake!) and snacks Sachin had packed (Man, was he prepared! Did I mention he carried multiple visors?) on the way we even stopped for �Tender Coconut� juice, which was refreshing considering the harsh TN heat.
After setting the AFR
The destined route
A closer look
What the temple looked like from below
Ahem� Back to topic, after we played around for a while, it was time for us to get back, and that meant climbing all those steps. I got that �getting hit in the gut by a crow bar� feeling, but then again it had to be done. The first couple of steps were effortless, but after like fifty or so steps I started to slow down and it felt like I�ve used up my total lung capacity, and whenever I felt tired I stopped and sat on the steps, a few of them ridiculed me, while they stepped over me and continued climbing, a few kids also pointed fingers and started laughing but I didn�t care much, cause those conditions had only affected my body, but in Sachin�s case it had directly hit his head, instead of climbing the steps he decided to climb onto the steep guide and decided to find his way up by grabbing onto the tree vines, when I come to think of it now, it�s a funny moment, but back when it happened, my brain was so clouded that I decided to join him. For every step I took I prayed and prayed, till I reached the final step, and by then I had repented every wrong deed I had ever done, the short journey had in fact helped unburden my conscience which was weighing in on me for a long time.
The never ending fleet of stairs
The water falls
The look on Sachin�s face after seeing the water fall
The road downhill
Getting back on the saddle after �P� break
When my vision started playing tricks on me
We rode further and just as we were nearing Madurai, I suddenly had the urge to hit Kerala from the south via Tenkasi as it�s a shorter route and I�d directly enter Kollam. So we bid farewell to each other. From there Sachin headed towards Thuckalay and en route stopped at a few other places I don�t recall where exactly but in one such place according to him they manufactured fireworks and were in the process of testing them, he had a splendid time witnessing the magic that followed.
And as for me, I had around 400kms or so to cover, my trusted touring companion and GPS unit, the �Samsung Galaxy Y� guided me till the Thirumangalam exit, after which it�s battery ran out. I got off the highway to ask for directions and ended up in a scary looking slum, but appearances can be deceiving, the people were extremely friendly and the guy whom I approached first didn�t know much about the route and called up his Brother In Law who worked as a truck driver, with his help, I got some clues regarding the route and continued to ride on. After a while I saw something that looked like a flyover, and decided to take it, it was really narrow and I had a tough time keeping up with the oncoming traffic, surprisingly I was the only one coming from my direction and frankly it did take me a while to figure out that it was a one way road and I was coming in from the wrong direction. By the time I figured things out, I had already covered around 2~3 kms, so I was forced to take a gradual U turn and then head back to where I started and that�s when I noticed an even narrower road, and that was it, off to Thirumangalam!
It was dark and I was riding through Rajapalayam, the roads were narrower but it was straight, never ending and completely lonely, to add to the fine ambience the roads weren�t illuminated.
I rode for a while and when I started to feel exhausted, decided to take a break, and that�s when I spotted a small road side shop, stopped, drank some water, smoked a cigarette and decided to continue. The next stop was at Thenkasi, it was then that I decided to call home and inform them that I was fine, used a coin phone and told mom that my battery was out and I was calling from a payphone near my hostel, she seemed convinced enough, I wished her a pleasant night and she did the same, after I hung up the phone, got back on the saddle and continued riding.
After what seemed like a long time, I got confused and stopped for directions, asked a pedestrian and resumed riding, the roads were congested and there was a lot of traffic, so stopped near a bunk, drank some water, smoked a cigarette and was back to riding, and I did ride for what felt like an eternity, but I wasn�t reaching anywhere, it felt as though my life at that moment was stuck in a loop, and it was starting to freak me out, so I decided to stop and ask for direction once more, spotted a pedestrian and stopped, I asked for directions and the moment he turned my way to answer, I got the shock of my life, it was the same person, which could only mean that I was going around in circles!
I was horrified and frantically gunning the throttle, I knew something was seriously wrong with me and I had to make it back home as soon as possible, after what seemed like a couple of hours I managed to cross Thenkasi and reached Aryankavu, this is a place which I�m really fond of, cause of the twisties with tactical potholes that really do put your skill to test. But at that particular time the same roads that I used to love felt dreadful, I couldn�t see a thing and to make things worse the truck which were travelling interstate routes were coming at dangerous speeds considering that I was having a hard time riding uphill when they just raced downhill without a care in the world, and to add insult to injury they took the extreme outer end of the corners which I later came to learn from a truck driving friend is that it�s a technique followed by the drivers to make sure that the truck doesn�t tip because of the weight its carrying, to overcome this they purposefully understeer but this meant I had just a few millimetres to ride and there was a high possibility that I might fall into the canyon, my Windtone�s from �Roots� were working full time and the drivers noticed me at the last possible moment and made way, it was super scary and at times when I had to really lean into it, I could actually feel the tip of my shoe drag against the tarmac.
Just after the Aryankavu pass, I found a tempo traveller with �KL-2� registration and if my memory serves me right I�ve never been more happier than that, cause by that time I was barely clinging onto consciousness, I went up to him and inquired about his planned route, he said something which I have no recollection of now, but at the time I was certain that it would be best if I trailed him, and that�s exactly what I did. The guy was definitely in a hurry. The Thenmala route is well known for its twisties and only the finest of riders/drivers would be able to cover the distance in optimum time, and this guy was driving as though he was going in for the kill, I have faint recollections of losing traction at rear multiple times but even though in a confused state I held strong to the idea of �When in doubt, Gas it!� and it did work out considering the speeds I had to do at the time to keep up, and if it hadn�t worked out then my story would�ve had an entirely different climax and in fact it might not have been me writing about it, anyways he stopped in front of a restaurant at Punalur, and both of us had dinner, I don�t remember what I ordered, but it felt good, my phone was dry so I borrowed someone�s phone and called home, told them I�ll be there in a couple of minutes, it was a stupid move, but at the time it seemed right.
After that everything was a mess, I remember reaching Kottarakara, and from there tried to ride towards Kollam, but couldn�t get the route right, one time I took a left instead of a right at Kadappakada went to Kottiyam and then Kundara and back to Kottarakara, next time I rode to Kollam by listing and counting place by place but I eventually screwed up and came back to Kottarakara using the Trivandrum route and was stopped by cops, somehow managed to convince them and got directions, rode for a bit and I could sense that I was running out of fuel so I slowed down and that�s when I saw a rickshaw parked on the roadside near a junction, went up to the guy, he thought I was intoxicated and since that�s a usual thing in Kerala, he offered to help me out, we parked my bike in a nearby Petrol bunk and I requested him to take note of the bunk�s location and inform my mom when we get home since I was definitely sure I won�t be in a position to remember it, he nodded and we headed home, though I had confusion regarding the route, I could recall my address with such precision that I had cautioned him in advance about avoiding going in through the Guest House circle cause the roads were not properly lighted and about stopping in front of the second gate after the corner next to the old closed down oil mill.
On the way he did ask me about my weird state of ecstasy, I assured him that I wasn�t drunk, but he just accepted with a smile. I knew it, the bastard didn�t believe me, but I can�t blame him.
On reaching home, the rickshaw guy informed my mom about the location of the bike and she paid him for safely getting me home.
Of course parents were pissed but they didn�t say anything out of the ordinary, dad whose working abroad called up and we talked for a while, and he educated me about the ill effects of consuming energy drinks as a replacement for drinking water and how it accelerated the effects of dehydration. And he also suggested I note down my experience on paper cause such experiences fade away from our memory with time, at the time I didn�t feel the need, but now I really do regret not doing so, cause I�ve lost most of it, and what I�ve penned down here is just a fraction of what had happened, no matter how hard I try to remember. And it�s not the places I�ve been to but the emotions I�ve gone through at those crucial moments that I fail to recall.
The next day morning or rather noon, when I woke up, was expecting a few aches here and there, but I was fine considering the distance I had covered, and folks that�s the ZMA, India�s best sports tourer, for you. And that�s when it hit me, crap! My bike! I had left it somewhere, asked mom and she gave me the co-ordinates of the petrol bunk, called up my buddy Ajmal, and within a few minutes he came with his brand new Honda CB Unicorn, and let me tell you, I�ve got many friends and some of them who live closer to my place, but there�s that one reliable friend everyone has, the one whom you can call up at any time of the day and you know for sure that he will be there for you, and for me that friend was Mr. Ajmal Imamudeen.
He handed over his helmet and keys, I rode the bike and he sat pillion, but that was just for a couple of km�s because I started feeling uneasy and we switched positions. On reaching the aforementioned bunk, I spotted my baby resting out in bright sunlight, I made the careless mistake of parking her in the open where as I should�ve parked her under a shade or something, but given the circumstances it was acceptable. The moment I turned the ignition on, the dash came to life and the digital trip meter registered 134x kms, I don�t remember the last digit, coming to think of it now, I should�ve taken a picture. But at that moment I didn�t care about all that, my precious bike the one that was gifted to me by my dad, it was still with me and that�s all that mattered. We put some gas on both bikes and rode back home, Ajmal insisted that he would follow me back home and in spite of me trying to dissuade him, he did.
While riding back, the first thing I noticed was that the pegs were worn and uneven, decide to get them replaced, but after a well deserving oil change. Everything else was perfect and I thank Honda�s reliability and Hero Honda (Now known as Hero Moto Corp) for bringing such a wonderful piece of machinery to the Indian market. After reaching home, Ajmal wished me well and went on his way, after which I parked the bike in her usual spot, and went back to bed, Fin.
Kolli Hills
From a greener angle
So now after going through my first long ride experience I�m sure many would think that after what had happened I might�ve opted for the practical option and left biking behind and moved on. But NOPE! I still ride and it doesn�t get any easier in fact the number of obstacles keep multiplying as you move forward, and in the end it�s not about what bike you�re riding or the distance you�ve covered, it ultimately rests in the kind of person you are. And do believe me when I say this, biking in its true essence is a process of discovering one�s self, it shows you the kind of person you really are, whether you have what it takes to bite the bullet and move on or if you�re not cut out for it and about to throw in the towel.
And as for me, I have made a lot of mistakes as a biker, but instead of feeling down and regretting my decisions I decided to learn from them, get back on the saddle and ride on, cause as they say �What doesn�t kill you, ends up making you stronger�.
-Ashwin
Ride hard, Ride safe
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