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Hilarious Quotes/Pictures/Answers ...

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  • Hilarious Quotes/Pictures/Answers ...

    Moderator's Note: Please take care of the following while posting in this thread:

    1. No uncensored profanity & vulgarity at all. We understand that being a biker, you must be atleast 18 years of age so slightly suggestive is ok, but again, we won't want a person Google-ing for XXX jokes to end up on our Xbhp, isn't it?

    2. No defamation or unnecessary mocking of any religion, group, etc. Please make your jokes religion-neutral.
    Slightly gender biased is ok, but not up to objectionable levels.



    ===============================

    Having come across many Hilarious Quotes/replies/pictures which make us burst out laughing, it is only fair to share some of it here. I am sure reading them will always bring new energy ,and happiness into our lives..Request members to contribute generously..

    For a start here are some from my end.....

    It's from Microsoft's Help Desk. This took place between customer support people and their customers:


    Customer: "You've got to fix my computer. I urgently need to, print a document, but the computer won't boot properly."
    Tech Support: "What does it say?"
    Customer: "Something about an error and non-system disk."
    Tech Support: "Look at your machine. Is there a floppy
    inside?"
    Customer: "No, but there's a sticker saying there's an Intel
    inside."
    ---------------------------------
    Tech Support: "Ok, now click your left mouse button."
    Customer: (silence) "But I only have one mouse."
    ---------------------------------
    Tech Support: "I need you to right-click on the Open
    Desktop."
    Customer: "Ok."
    Tech Support: "Did you get a pop-up menu?"
    Customer: "No."
    Tech Support: "Ok. Right click again. Do you see a pop-up
    menu?"
    Customer: "No."
    Tech Support: "Ok, sir. Can you tell me what you have done up
    until this point?"
    Customer: "Sure, you told me to write 'click' and I wrote'click'."
    ---------------------------------
    Customer: "I received the software update you sent, but I am still getting the same error message."
    Tech Support: "Did you install the update?"
    Customer: "No. Oh, am I supposed to install it to get it to
    work?"
    ---------------------------------
    Customer: "I'm having trouble installing Microsoft Word."
    Tech Support: "Tell me what you've done."
    Customer: "I typed 'A:SETUP'."
    Tech Support: "Ma'am, remove the disk and tell me what it
    says."
    Customer: "It says '[PC manufacturer] Restore and Recovery
    disk'."
    Tech Support: "Insert the MS Word setup disk."
    Customer: "What?"
    Tech Support: "Did you buy MS word?"
    Customer "No..."
    ---------------------------------
    Customer: "Do I need a computer to use your software?"
    Tech Support: ?@#$
    ---------------------------------
    Tech Support: "Ok, in the bottom left hand side of the screen,
    can you see the 'OK' button displayed?"
    Customer: "Wow. How can you see my screen from there?"
    ---------------------------------
    Tech Support: "What type of computer do you have?"
    Customer: "A white one."
    ---------------------------------
    Tech Support: "Type 'A:' at the prompt."
    Customer: "How do you spell that?"
    ---------------------------------


    Have a good time...
    Last edited by Samarth 619; 07-29-2013, 11:40 AM. Reason: Added Rules.
    When Was The Last Time,You Did Something For The First Time.

  • #2
    Off Topic Discussion Approved
    Advice is a form of nostalgia.
    Dispensing it is a way of fishing the past from the disposal, wiping it off, painting over the ugly parts and recycling it for more than it's worth.

    Antz Travelz!! | South India Exploration Ride | Leh Triplog (Work in progress)

    Comment


    • #3
      Originally posted by psr View Post
      Having come across many Hilarious Quotes/replies/pictures which make us burst out laughing, it is only fair to share some of it here . I am sure reading them will always bring new energy ,and happiness into our lives..Request members to contribute generously ..

      For a start here are some from my end.....
      Have a good time...
      Bro the best laugh i've had for weeks!! Thank you
      ZMR- PGMFI re-defined

      Comment


      • #4
        Very nice idea psr ji ! Thank you for creating this thread.

        Do you have Windows? - Funny Tech support nightmares - Flipbook: Top Ten Funny Tech support nightmares

        Comment


        • #5
          I.T Techie to his Wife:

          I
          f I were a painter......

          you would be my painting,



          if i were an author.....

          ! you would be my story,


          if i were a poet.....

          you would be my poem,



          BUT

          I'm a Programmer...






          and you are my BUG


          Last edited by psr; 11-23-2012, 10:13 AM.
          When Was The Last Time,You Did Something For The First Time.

          Comment


          • #7
            Originally posted by psr View Post
            .........these are just a few, you may share few more that you can add to these
            People don't call you up & ask "Are you busy"
            Skill is what keeps you on a Motorcycle
            Awareness + Skill is what keeps you out of harm's way
            ATGATT + Awareness + Skill means you might Live To Ride another day

            Comment


            • #8
              Originally posted by aargee View Post
              People don't call you up & ask "Are you busy"
              Ha ha ha ....That's definitely true for me....since I am now 60+..and in a different league
              When Was The Last Time,You Did Something For The First Time.

              Comment


              • #9
                Feel free to remove this as it's related to motorcycle discussion that happened about 2 years ago...

                Me : Feel like buying a ZMR (Fi) & getting it modified like RTR
                Mechanic : Good idea sir, you'll have power + you can smoke out all RTR's
                Me : Not to smoke out, but just to move with technology
                Mechanic : Get ZMA (Carb) sir, not the Fi, that is waste
                Me : Oh!!! Is it? Why?
                Mechanic : They've simply put fairings, rear disc brake & we have to pay additionally for that. The price doesn't justify
                Me : What about Fi?
                Mechanic : Fi is waste Sir, nothing can beat carb. Fi is useful only where there're petrol theft
                Skill is what keeps you on a Motorcycle
                Awareness + Skill is what keeps you out of harm's way
                ATGATT + Awareness + Skill means you might Live To Ride another day

                Comment


                • #10
                  Originally posted by psr View Post
                  It's from Microsoft's Help Desk. This took place between customer support people and their customers:


                  Customer: "You've got to fix my computer. I urgently need to, print a document, but the computer won't boot properly."
                  Tech Support: "What does it say?"
                  Customer: "Something about an error and non-system disk."
                  Tech Support: "Look at your machine. Is there a floppy
                  inside?"
                  Customer: "No, but there's a sticker saying there's an Intel
                  inside."
                  ---------------------------------
                  Customer: "I received the software update you sent, but I am still getting the same error message."
                  Tech Support: "Did you install the update?"
                  Customer: "No. Oh, am I supposed to install it to get it to
                  work?"
                  ---------------------------------
                  Customer: "Do I need a computer to use your software?"
                  Tech Support: ?@#$
                  ---------------------------------
                  Tech Support: "What type of computer do you have?"
                  Customer: "A white one."
                  ---------------------------------
                  This had actually happened to me when working for Microsoft Tech support
                  Stories of the open road...........

                  Comment


                  • #11
                    Children come up with some of the best replies to a question.

                    Question : what will you see if you go up Mount Vesuvius ?
                    Kid : You will see the Creator Smoking.

                    Question : Explain Vacuum in simple words.
                    Kid : Vacuum is a place where all of it's inside are outside of itself !.






                    Last edited by psr; 11-23-2012, 11:19 AM.
                    When Was The Last Time,You Did Something For The First Time.

                    Comment


                    • #12
                      Re: Hilarious Quotes/Pictures/Answers ...

                      Originally posted by shoeb2015 View Post
                      Thanks for the link

                      Sent from my GT-I9100 using Tapatalk 2
                      Don't Judge Bikers , We are Happy People! :D
                      Don't look where you are , Look where you want to go.
                      Over-confidence always kills

                      Comment


                      • #13
                        This incident happened few years ago with my 8th standard cousin over the phone; those were the times when CD writers were quite expensive. I used to have this one...


                        Cousin : Father got me a CD writer just like the one you have
                        Me : Whoa!!! It's way too expensive. Where did you get one from? How much did it cost?
                        Cousin : Don't know, but Father got me one
                        Me : Shoots!!! It's not even available in India. Is it from grey market?
                        Cousin : I think he got it from the fancy store that sells imported goods
                        Me : Fancy store???
                        Cousin : Yes; but the one I've writes in black color
                        Me : Black color??? That is when it struck me, he's talking about this...

                        Skill is what keeps you on a Motorcycle
                        Awareness + Skill is what keeps you out of harm's way
                        ATGATT + Awareness + Skill means you might Live To Ride another day

                        Comment


                        • #14
                          Originally posted by psr View Post
                          Ha ha ha ....That's definitely true for me....since I am now 60+..and in a different league
                          60+!! Am really really sorry sir. I did not know your age and am calling you bro! No offence meant!!
                          ZMR- PGMFI re-defined

                          Comment


                          • #15
                            Originally posted by abhi7013 View Post
                            60+!! Am really really sorry sir. I did not know your age and am calling you bro! No offence meant!!
                            Don't feel bad,since no offense taken...I am actually 25 yrs old with 35 years experience... relax and enjoy life as it is meant to be....
                            When Was The Last Time,You Did Something For The First Time.

                            Comment

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