Re: Hilarious Quotes/Pictures/Answers ...

1. Mom: If a boy touches your boobs say "don't" and if he touches your pussy say "stop"?
Girl: But mom, he touched both so I said "don’t stop".....

2. When is a man most intelligent, before, after or during sex?
During sex cuz he's plugged up to the knowledge source...

3. Why do women like to have sex with the lights off?
They can't stand to see a man have a good time.....

4. How do you know if you have a high sperm count ?
If she has to chew before she can swallow....

5. Sex is like maths. Add a bed, Subtract the clothes, Divide the legs, and pray you don’t Multiply !!!!

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I have absolutely no idea how this is possible.

Re: Hilarious Quotes/Pictures/Answers ...

A Must read guys

[1] Regular naps prevent old age, especially if you take them while driving.

[2] Having one child makes you a parent; having two you are a referee.

[3] Marriage is a relationship in which one person is always right and the other is the husband!

[4] I believe we should all pay our tax with a smile. I tried - but they wanted cash.

[5] A child's greatest period of growth is the month after you've purchased new school uniforms.

[6] Don't feel bad. A lot of people have no talent.

[7] Don't marry the person you want to live with, marry the one you cannot live without, but whatever you do, you'll regret it later.

[8] You can't buy love, but you pay heavily for it.

[9] Bad officials are elected by good citizens who do not vote.

[10] Laziness is nothing more than the habit of resting before you get tired.

[11] Marriage is give and take. You'd better give it to her or she'll take it anyway.

[12] My wife and I always compromise. I admit I'm wrong and she agrees with me.

[13] Those who can't laugh at themselves leave the job to others.

[14] Ladies first. Pretty ladies sooner.

[15] A successful marriage requires falling in love many times, always with the same person.

[16] You're getting old when you enjoy remembering things more than doing them.

[17] It doesn't matter how often a married man changes his job, he still ends up with the same boss.

[18] Real friends are the ones who survive transitions between address books.

[19] Saving is the best thing. Especially when your parents have done it for you.

[20] Wise men talk because they have something to say; fools talk because they have to say something

[21] They call our language the mother tongue because the father seldom gets to speak!

[22] Man: Is there any way for long life? Dr: Get married. Man: Will it help? Dr: No, but then the thought of long life will never come.

[23]Why do couples hold hands during their wedding? It's a formality just like two boxers shaking hands before the fight begins!

[24]Wife: Darling today is our anniversary, what should we do? Husband: Let us stand in silence for 2 minutes.

[25]It's funny when people discuss Love Marriage vs Arranged. It's like asking someone, if suicide is better or being murdered.

[26]There is only one perfect child in the world and every mother has it.

[27]There is only one perfect wife in the world and every neighbor has it!

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Another one

DEFINITION of "bachpan"::: ------------------Once choosing the colour of a sketch pen was a tough task.
🔵🔶🔷

Occupying the window seat in the school bus was called obsession.🚎🚎🚎🚎🚎

Getting a toffee as a birthday treat from a friend made our day.
🍬🍫🍭🍬🍫🍭🍬🍫🍭🍭

Being the first one to finish copying from the blackboard was the ultimate moment of pride.


Hiding the answers
📄📃📑📋📋📋📋📋📋
from a bench partner during exams was not called selfishness.

When homework 📕📗📘📙📓📔📕📗
was the only torture & finished it soon,
so could get some extra time to play.🎮🏉🎳

Early to bed
🌌🌌,
early to rise
🌞🌝🌝🌝🌝
was life's mantra, but how we loved sleeping late and having some extra TV time!
🎮🎮

Owning a cycle was owning BMW
🚵🚴🚵🚴🚵🚴

To look good was only to wear our fav dress frocks for girls n half pants for boys.
👖👖👖👖👖

We didn't need FB or a phone to keep in touch!
👭👬👭👭👬👬👭👭

We thought all elders are ideal, when Daddy was the only hero

and Mom was the only Best friend."👪

So what they say is right.
"Everybody dies twice. Once when their childhood ends."
👭👭👬👬👬👭

Got this awesome msg that made my day

Hope u all like it too..


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Just received a call from a girl in a placement agency :

" Sir, I've got 2 openings..... Wud u be interested?? "

Pagli., yeh bhi koi poochne wali baat hai...

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The changes a TOWEL can bring into one's life....

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In a party a General proudly said that he did "it" 7 times with his wife on his wedding night

Brigadier next to him said he did it 6 times before going to sleep 1st night

Colonel claimed he did it 4 times on his first night

All turned towards a young capt n asked how many times did he do on his wedding night

Capt replied: Only once sir

General laughed n asked WHY??

Capt replied: My wife wasn't used to it sir!!!!
Pindrop silence.......and a Lesson learnt politely

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The impact of the word SALE on a female's brain is similar to what the word B**BS has on a male's brain.
.
..
...
GRAB IT!

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Height of confidence

Dr to 80 years aged men-is umar me jawan ladki k sath sex karna jaan lewa ho sakta h.

Buddha- I don't care,marti hai to mar jaye .....!

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Question :::: You are in a boat in the middle of a river. You have 2 Cigarettes and have to light any one cigarette. You don't have anything else with you in the boat? How will you do it ?...Scroll down,...,,Answer: Take one cigarette and throw it in the water. So the boat will become LIGHTER........using this LIGHTER you can light the other Cigarette.. another deadly answer. Scroll down a little.........Another solution: You throw a cigarette up and catch it. Catches win Matches. Using the matches that you win, you can light the cigarette.. If that was not enough, one more deadly answer.... scroll down............Take water in your hand and drop it drop by drop...(TIP - TIP)"TIP TIP barsa Pani.Pani ne aag lagayee."us aag se hamne cigarette jalayee" .........If that was not enough, one more deadly answer.... scroll down......Start praising one cigarette, The other will get jealous & "jalney lagega...... "Searching for me ?....I am also searching for the person who sent it to me!!!

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Romance to dekho..!!
Ladka: Tum to meri chaand ho...!!
Ladki: Aur tum ho mere
'Neel Armstrong',
Mujh pe chadhne wala pehla aadmi... 

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Girl asked BF- 'Who is Sunny Leone?' He replied-'She is female version of. Sunny Deol... with wahi dhai dhai kilo ( . )( . ) jisko dekh kar aadmi uthta nai Admi ka Uth Jata Hai !!

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Best ever funniest joke red on sunny Leone ever.....

BTW the ever active thread found on the forum....

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Height of Insult:-
Man surfing channels asks his wife: Darling, should i watch football???
Wife: For god's sake watch porn, u already know how to play football.