Re: Hilarious Quotes/Pictures/Answers ...

Re: Hilarious Quotes/Pictures/Answers ...

A King enrolled his donkey in a race & won.
Local paper read:
'KING's ASS WON'

The king was so upset with this kind of publicity that he gave the donkey to the queen.
The local paper then read:
"QUEEN HAS THE BEST ASS IN TOWN"
The king fainted....

Queen sold the donkey to a farmer for 10$.
Next day paper read: "QUEEN SELLS HER ASS FOR $10"
The queen fainted...

The next day king ordered the queen to buy back the donkey and leave it in jungle.
The Next Headlines:
"QUEEN ANNOUNCES HER ASS IS FREE & WILD"
The king died... !!

Thats Media...!!

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A lawyer came home after having sex in his car.

Girl forgot her bra n panty in car.

The wife found them, tore them up n shouted: U dirty bastard u hv been screwing ur secretary.

Without blinking an eyelid, lawyer shouted back. ***** u hv just destroyed d only evidence of a high profile rape case I have been working on. U can now forget abt diamond necklace u were asking for,

Wife fell on her knees, crying & trying 2 repair d torn pieces & lawyer walked away wid a smile...

Moral: Start studying LAW��

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A honest joke...�� Wife to Husband (on Phone): Hi. Are you busy? Husband: Yes! Why? What is it? Wife: I have a Good news & a Badnews! Husband: Just give me the Good news, don't have time for the Bad Wife: Ok, the Good news is that the Air Bags in our new BMW 7 series worked perfectly FINE ..!!

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I AM RICH! Okay. And this this just happened to me today.

I've won 4 crores, 67 Lakhs and 50,000. Enough to get all the bikes I wanted that I can dream of. If only it were real.







Cheers!
VJ

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Santa Ne Bus Me Ek Ladki Ko Chhed Diya.

Ladki- Tumhare Ghar Me Maa Behen Nahi He Kya??

Santa- Kya Pata Me To Subah Se Ghar Se Bahar Hu..

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Aisi Koi Chiz Batao Jisko Bajane Se Andar Se Bacche Nikalte Hai..?
Socho ..... Nhi Malum???
"School Ki Ghanti"
Soch Badalo Desh Badlega.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Jab ladki sare kapde nikal deti hai to kya hota hai ???
Almari khali ho jati hai..
Soch badlo, Desh badlega!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Kehte hai aurat ke hath mein barkat hoti hai,
Sahi hai, Kyun ki..
2 inch ki chiz ko 7 inch ka kar deti hai,
Im talking about.... Roti

Uffffhoooo ab to Apni Soch badlo, Desh badlega.. 

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that's exactly how some people look who buy an SLR and think they are professionals, but at the end, they look like this. . .

Cheers!!!

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Re: Hilarious Quotes/Pictures/Answers ...

The love story of Ron and Edna.

Just because someone doesn't love you the way you want them to, doesn't mean they don't love you with all they have.

Ron and Edna were both patients in a mental hospital.

One day while they were walking past the hospital swimming pool.

Ron suddenly jumped into the deep end.

He sank to the bottom of the pool and stayed there.

Edna promptly jumped in to save him.

She swam to the bottom and pulled him out.

When the Head Nurse Director became aware of Edna heroic act she immediately ordered her to be discharged from the hospital, as she now considered her to be mentally stable.

When she went to tell Edna the news she said, 'Edna, I have good news and bad news.

The good news is you're being discharged, since you were able to rationally respond to a crisis by jumping in and saving the life of the person you love.

I have concluded that your act displays sound mindedness. The bad news is, Ron hung himself in the bathroom with his bathrobe belt right after you saved him.

I am so sorry, but he's dead.'

Edna replied (you'll love this) .
..
..
..
..
..
..
..
..
..
..
..

'He didn't hang himself, I put him there to dry..
How soon can I go home?'

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Kanjibhai was travelling to Bombay to take up a new job.

Rupaben was also travelling in the same compartment except that they didn't
know each other in the beginning.

Once they started talking, they realized they both had a lot in common.

a.. Both were Single.
b.. Both were Gujaratis.
c.. Both were going to Bombay .
d.. Both were teachers.
e.. Both were starting new jobs at Mithibai College ...
They seemed to hit it off well and decided to be roommates in Bombay and
made a pact that they would do everything together..

So they lived in the same house, travelled to the college together on
Kanjibhai's scooter, had lunch in the staff room together, returned home
together.

They were watching the TV together, eating dinner together and were also
sharing the same bedroom and...

EVEN sharing the same bed.

The only problem was Rupaben placing a pillow between them at bedtime, much
to the frustration of Kanjibhai, who ended up spending many sleepless nights
with this most desirable beauty besides him, separated by the pillow.

Kanjibhai's frustration built up to such an extent that he could take it no
more and ended up deciding to drink.

So one day he took off from the college leaving Rupaben on her own.

She was quite upset, but made it home by auto rikshaw.

The pact had been broken so she decided not to open the door for Kanjibhai
when he got home drunk at about 2 AM.

Kanjibhai knocked on the door for about 20 minutes and pleaded with his
roommate to let him in.

After listening to his crap for 20 minutes, Rupaben said, ' Where the hell
did you disappear today? We decided to do everything together! Now on you
will sleep outside'.

Kanjibhai said, 'I will jump over the wall and come in if you don't
open the door right now!'

Rupaben replied,
Scroll Down for Punch Line......................

















'Have...reva de! Reva de! Chaar mahina thaya...
Tu to Pillow ni upar thi jump na kari sakyo...to deewal upar thi su jump Karva nu!! 😋

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Dosto ko Aksar Suna Hai kehte...
"Zinda Rahenge To Fir Milenge"
Par ek sache dost ne to kya Khub Kaha Hai,
Ki,
"Milte Rehenge To Zinda Rahenge".

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4 Nuns stand in a Q to confess.

1st: Father, I saw a P***s.
Father: Go & wash ur eyes in holy water.

2nd: I touchd it!
Father: U go wash ur hands in holy water.

Suddenly d 4th Nun runs to d holy water.
Father: Where r u going ?

4th Nun: I want to gargle with holy water before sister Gloria dips her @$$ in it!

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Touched my heart bro.....

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Ek newly married couple ne paper me ad diya:"Ladka paida karne ka tarika batao?"
Bengal se letter aya..Biwi ko Fish do.
Haryana se letter aya.. Milk Cake do.
Himachal se letter aya.. Apple do.Gujarat se letter aya.. Dhokla do.Punjab se letter aya..Sanu "SEWA DA MAUKA"do!