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This is your pilot

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An aged farmer and his wife were leaning against the age of their pig-pen when the old woman recalled that the next week would mark
their golden wedding anniversary. "Let's have a party, Homer," she suggested, "let's kill a pig."
The farmer scratched his head. "Gee, Ethel," he finally answered, "I don't see why the pig should suffer for something that happened 50
years ago."

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A police officer in a small town stopped a motorist who was speeding down the main street. "But officer," the man said, "I can explain."
"Just be quiet," snapped the officer. "I'm going to let you cool your heels in jail until the chief gets back." "But officer, I just wanted to
say,....."
"And I said to keep quiet! You're going to jail!"
A few hours later the officer looked in on his prisoner and said, "Lucky for you that the chief's at his daughter's wedding. He'll be on a
good mood when he gets back."
"Don't count on it," answered the fellow in the cell, "I'm the groom."

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There is a saying: "Women are magicians...." Wonder why?? Well...

THEY CAN MAKE AN ISSUE OUT OF ANYTHING!!



Cheers,

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Damn! nobody seems to be interested in watching frog marriage now. That message was posted by my other half, we got married (well, eloped) the day before yesterday. Couple of xBhpians already know this I think.

EDIT:

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Kangana hit the ball
Kangana took a single
Kangana did not reach the crease
Kangana Ranaut.
😂😂

Sameera went to a parlor
Sameera did her hair
Sameera did her makeup
Sameera Reddy
😂😂

Lance arms weak.
Lance joins gym.
Lance does chin-ups.
Lance Armstrong
😂😂

Hrithik entered dark room
Hrithik scared
Hrithik searched for switches
Hrithik switches on the lights
Hrithik Roshan
😂😂

Poonam puts Chuna
Poonam puts Kathha
Poonam puts Gulkand
Poonam puts supari
Poonam Pandey
😂😂

Bipasha walking
Bipasha running
Bipasha tired
Bipasha Basu..
😂😂

Ratan comes.
Ratan Hi
Ratan goes.
Ratan Tata.
😂😂

Sonia was playing
Sonia fell in mud
Sonia Gandhi
😂😂

Anushka met virat
Virat smiled
Anushka sharma
😂😂

John is a strong man
Tortures Bipasha
She asks him to spare her.
John ab-raham
😂😂

Pankaj got a lottery ticket
Pankaj did not win
Pankaj udaas
😂😂

Mika went to studio
Mika went to recording room
Mika took the mike
Mika singh
😂😂

William making fruit shake
William took pears
William put them in glass
William shakespeare
😂😂

David Was Hungry
David Goes To Supermarket
David Buys Ham
David Buys Oven
David Goes Home
David Beckham
😂😂

Umar walking on the road
Umar got kidnapped
Umar not found by family
Umar gul
😂😂

Minisha purchased a cycle
Minisha started riding cycle
Minisha's height increased
Minisha lamba
😂😂

Sent from my Nexus 5 using Tapatalk

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And please for die hard fans its just a forward......


Sent from my Nexus 5 using Tapatalk

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Rather than hilarious, more of an ouch situation!

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Sent from my MK16i using xBhp Connect mobile app

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People drink & smoke for few days & get addicted to it.

I'm studying since nursery. But, still not addicted to studying.

This is called 'self control'

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Hubby : What's Hypnotism?

Wife : Taking control over someone & making him perform as per our wish.

Hubby : Don't fool me. That's Marriage, Not Hypnotism !

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congrats

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A woman was flailing about in the water. Unable to swim, a man standing outside screamed for help. A fisherman ran up. The man said, "Please save my
wife from drowning. I'll give you a $100."
The fisherman helped her back to the shore. The man looked at him and said,"When I saw her going down for the third time, I thought it was my wife.
But this is my mother-in-law."
The fisherman said, "Just my luck. How much do I owe you?"


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At the height of a political corruption trial, the prosecuting attorney attacked a witness. "Is not it true," he bellowed, "that you accepted five thousand
dollars to compromise this case?"
The witness stared out the window as though he hadn't hear the question. "Isn't it true that you accepted five thousand dollars to compromise this
case?" the lawyer repeated.
The witness still did not respond. Finally, the judge leaned over and said, "Sir, please answer the question."
"Oh," the startled witness said, "I thought he was talking yo you."

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For all those who are preparing for aptitude for any competitive exam,hehehe logic at its height.
Sent from my LG-P765 using xBhp Connect mobile app

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Object Oriented Thinking

A boy tries to look inside a girls shirt in a class
Girl: It is Bad Manners!
Boy: No!! It is not
Girl: Why???
Boy: "Members of the same class can access private Data"

Dedicated to programmers