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**Sagar Banerjee** · 07-15-2013, 08:16 AM

Re: Hilarious Quotes/Pictures/Answers ...

Three guys were sitting in a biker bar. A man came in, already drunk, sat down at the bar and ordered a drink. The man looked around and saw the 3 men sitting at a corner table. He got up, staggered to the table, leaned over, looked the biggest one in the face and said, "I went by your grandma's house and I saw her in the hallway, buck naked. Man, she is fine!" The biker looked at him and didn't say a word. His buddies were confused,because he was a bad ass, and would fight at he drop of a hat. The drunk leaned on the table again and said, "I got it on with your grandma and she is good, the best I ever had!" The biker still said nothing. His buddies were starting to get mad. The drunk leaned on the table again and said, "I'll tell you something else boy, your grandma liked it!" The biker stood up, took the drunk by the shoulder and said, "Damn it, Grandpa, you're drunk! Go home!"[/QUOTE]

That's a gud one...

Sent from my GT-N7100 using xBhp Connect mobile app

**petrolhead_chn** · 07-15-2013, 08:29 AM

Re: Hilarious Quotes/Pictures/Answers ...

Originally posted by Sagar Banerjee View Post

Three guys were sitting in a biker bar. A man came in, already drunk, sat down at the bar and ordered a drink. The man looked around and saw the 3 men sitting at a corner table. He got up, staggered to the table, leaned over, looked the biggest one in the face and said, "I went by your grandma's house and I saw her in the hallway, buck naked. Man, she is fine!" The biker looked at him and didn't say a word. His buddies were confused,because he was a bad ass, and would fight at he drop of a hat. The drunk leaned on the table again and said, "I got it on with your grandma and she is good, the best I ever had!" The biker still said nothing. His buddies were starting to get mad. The drunk leaned on the table again and said, "I'll tell you something else boy, your grandma liked it!" The biker stood up, took the drunk by the shoulder and said, "Damn it, Grandpa, you're drunk! Go home!"

That's a gud one...

Sent from my GT-N7100 using xBhp Connect mobile app

Sagar, I guess you posted the same one that I did above or is that a GT-N7100 error

**Sagar Banerjee** · 07-15-2013, 08:42 AM

Re: Hilarious Quotes/Pictures/Answers ...

Originally posted by petrolhead_chn View Post

Sagar, I guess you posted the same one that I did above or is that a GT-N7100 error

Sir I just replied to your quote stating that I like it... I didn't paste a new one....

**petrolhead_chn** · 07-15-2013, 08:47 AM

Re: Hilarious Quotes/Pictures/Answers ...

**rreneav1987** · 07-15-2013, 09:14 AM

Re: Hilarious Quotes/Pictures/Answers ...

Sent from my Spice Mi-530 using Tapatalk 4 Beta

**psr** · 07-15-2013, 10:18 AM

Re: Hilarious Quotes/Pictures/Answers ...

**petrolhead_chn** · 07-15-2013, 01:06 PM

Re: Hilarious Quotes/Pictures/Answers ...

A hip young man goes out and buys the best car available: a 1996, Cosmo Quad Turbo RX-7. It is the best and most expensive car in the world, and it runs him 500,000 EURO. He takes it out for a spin and, while doing so, stops for a red light. An old man on a moped (looking about 90 years old) pulls up next to him. The old man looks over the sleek, shiny surface of the car and asks, "What kind of car ya' got there, sonny?"

The young man replies: "A 1996 Cosmo Quad Turbo RX-7. It cost 500,000 EURO.

"That's a lot of money" says the old man, shocked. "Why does it cost so much?

"Because this car can do up to 200 miles an hour!" states the cool dude proudly.

The moped driver asks, "Can I take a look inside?

"Sure," replies the owner. So, the old man pokes his head in the window and looks around. Leaning back on his moped, the old man says "That's a pretty nice car, all right!"
Just then, the light changes, so the guy decides to show the old man what his car can do. He floors it, and within 30 seconds the speedometer reads 200 MPH. Suddenly, he notices a dot in his rear view mirror. It seems to be getting closer! He slows down to see what it could be and suddenly, whhhoossh! Something whips by him, going much faster! "What on earth could be going faster than my 7?" the young man asks himself. Then, ahead of him, he sees a dot coming toward him. Whoooooosh! It goes by again, heading the opposite direction! And, it almost looked like the old man on the moped! "Couldn't be," thinks the guy. "How could a moped outrun an RX-7?" Again, he sees a dot in his rear view mirror! Whooooosh Ka-Bbbla...MMM! It plows into the back of his car, demolishing the rear end. The young man jumps out, and Jesus to Betsy, it is the old man!!! Of course, the moped and the old man are hurting for certain. He runs up to the dying old man and says, "You're hurt bad! Is there anything I can do for you?"

The old man groans and replies "Yes. Unhook my suspenders from your side-view mirror!"

**chaosaddict** · 07-15-2013, 01:16 PM

Re: Hilarious Quotes/Pictures/Answers ...

OK, I am having severe Monday blue & I guess many of you're having the same,, so here are a few to happy afternoon...

**devils_friend** · 07-15-2013, 03:19 PM

Re: Hilarious Quotes/Pictures/Answers ...

Restaurant Advertisement:

We serve food as HOT as your neighbour's wife, and beer as COLD as your own wife.

**rreneav1987** · 07-15-2013, 06:55 PM

Re: Hilarious Quotes/Pictures/Answers ...

Religious Husband

A HUSBAND COMES HOME FROM CHURCH;
HE GREETS HIS WIFE AND LIFTS HER UP. HE THEN CARRIED
HER AROUND THE HOUSE.

THE WIFE WAS SO SURPRISED AND SHE ASKED
' DID THE BISHOP PREACH ABOUT BEING ROMANTIC ' ?

THE HUSBAND SAID, ' NO, HE SAID WE MUST
CARRY OUR BURDENS AND SORROWS '

**sambit** · 07-15-2013, 08:08 PM

Re: Hilarious Quotes/Pictures/Answers ...

Originally posted by rreneav1987 View Post

Religious Husband

A HUSBAND COMES HOME FROM CHURCH;
HE GREETS HIS WIFE AND LIFTS HER UP. HE THEN CARRIED
HER AROUND THE HOUSE.

THE WIFE WAS SO SURPRISED AND SHE ASKED
' DID THE BISHOP PREACH ABOUT BEING ROMANTIC ' ?

THE HUSBAND SAID, ' NO, HE SAID WE MUST
CARRY OUR BURDENS AND SORROWS '

After that, the Burdens and Sorrows must have increased...... :P

**rreneav1987** · 07-15-2013, 08:56 PM

Re: Hilarious Quotes/Pictures/Answers ...

Originally posted by sambit View Post

After that, the Burdens and Sorrows must have increased...... :P

I doubt that the guy lived after that day

**rreneav1987** · 07-15-2013, 10:23 PM

Re: Hilarious Quotes/Pictures/Answers ...

Sent from my Spice Mi-530 using Tapatalk 4 Beta

**sandy.avy220** · 07-16-2013, 05:59 AM

Re: Hilarious Quotes/Pictures/Answers ...

IN THE BEGINNING—CORPORATE STYLE

In the Beginning, there was The Plan; but The Plan was without form; and man created The Procedure.
Darkness was upon the face of the employees; and they were sore afraid; and they looked upon their supervisors and cried:
“It is a crock of dung and stinks to High Heaven!”
And the supervisors spake unto the project supervisors, saying:
“It is a bucket of manure and intolerably malodorous.”
And the project administrators spake unto the section managers, saying:
“It is a vessel of fertilizer and exceedingly strong.”
And the section managers spake unto the department directors, saying:
“It promoteth growth and is very powerful.”
And the department directors spake unto the company president, saying:
“It augmenteth development and productivity.”
And the company president looked down on The Procedure and declared:
“AND IT WAS GOOD!” And so the Plan became Policy.This is how Shit Happens.