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An Irish priest was driving to New York and got stopped for speeding in Connecticut. The state trooper smelled alcohol on the priest's breath and then saw an empty wine bottle on the floor of the car.

He asked, "Sir, have you been drinking?"

"Just water," said the priest.

The trooper asked, "Then why do I smell wine?"

The priest looked at the bottle and then exclaimed, "Good Lord! He's done it again!"

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Wife: Honey doctor has advised me to take a one month vacation at some serene place like Switzerland or Greece!! Where shall we go??
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Husband: To another doctor!!

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Now please calm down...

----consecutive posts auto-merged-----

The undisputed world posing champ



PJ

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Cheers!
VJ

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Innovative India

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oh la la!!



Cheers!
VJ

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H - "Hello?"
W - "Honey, it's me. Are you at the club?"
H - "Yes." W - "Great! I am at the mall two blocks from where you are. I just saw a beautiful mink coat. It's absolutely gorgeous!! Can I buy it?"
H - "What's the price?"
W - "Only $1,500.00."
H - "Well, OK, go ahead and get it, if you like it that much..."
W - "Ahhh, and I also stopped by the Mercedes dealership and saw the 2001 models. I saw one I really liked. I spoke with the salesman, and he gave me a really good price...and since we need to exchange the BMW that we bought last year..."
H-"What price did he quote you?"
W - "Only $60,000..."
H - "OK, but for that price I want it with all the options."
W - "Great! But before we hang up, something else..."
H - "What?"
W - "It might look like a lot, but I was reconciling your bank account and...I stopped by the real estate agent this morning and saw the house we had looked at last year. It's on sale!! Remember? The one with a pool, English Garden, acre of park area, beachfront property."
H - "How much are they asking?"
W - "Only $450,000 - a magnificent price...and I see that we have that much in the bank to cover..."
H - "Well, then go ahead and buy it, but just bid $420,000. OK?"
W - "OK, sweetie...Thanks! I'll see you later!! I love you!!!"
H - "Bye...I love u too..."

[The man hangs up, closes the phone's flap, and raises his hand while holding the phone and asks to all those present: "Does anyone know who this phone belongs to?"]

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PETROL Effect.

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Not really funny, but, certainly to think about - who is really wealthy?

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A scene after Teachers day.

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Wife: Darling today is our anniversary, what should we do?
Husband: Let us stand in silence for 2 minutes.

***

A bus full of housewives going on a picnic crashed with no survivors.
Each husband cried for a week.
But one husband continued for more than two weeks.
When asked he replied miserably... "My wife missed the bus"

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Corporate Bhagwad Gita

Hey Employee,

|| Tum pichli late promotion ka
paschatap mat karo ||

|| Tum Agli Promotion ki
chinta bhi mat karo ||

|| Bus apni current posting se
hi prassan raho |

|| Tum Jab nahin the tab bhi ye
office chal raha tha ||

|| Tum jab nahin hoge, tab bhi ye
chalta rehega |

|| Jo Laptop aaj tumhara hai,
Kal kisi or ka tha ||

|| Parso kisi or ka hoga. Tum ise
apna samaj kar magan ho rahe
ho.

|| Yahi tumhare samast
dukho ka kaaran hai. ||

||Appraisal, incentive, promotion
increment ye shabad apne man
se nikal do ||

|| Phir tum is office ke ho
Aur ye office tumhara hai |

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Dhadkane ruk gai meri ye sun kr,

Jb glass tutne par kaam wali ne kaha
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"wat the hell is this......

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IRCTC online booking....