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**petrolhead_chn** · 09-10-2013, 11:49 AM

Re: Hilarious Quotes/Pictures/Answers ...

***Few Reasons Handguns are Better than Women***

You can trade an old 44 for two shiny new 22s.

It's OK to keep one handgun at home and have another for when you're on the road.

Your primary handgun doesn't mind if you keep another handgun for a backup.

Your handgun will stay with you even if you run out of ammo.

A handgun takes up remarkably little closet space.

A handgun has never asked... "Do these grips make my butt look fat?"

A handgun doesn't mind if you go to sleep after you use it.

AND THE BEST REASON...You can buy a silencer for a handgun.

**HyperRetard** · 09-10-2013, 01:04 PM

Re: Hilarious Quotes/Pictures/Answers ...

Thanks, but I think I'd go for an SMG.

**xpranav** · 09-10-2013, 03:26 PM

Re: Hilarious Quotes/Pictures/Answers ...

this pic is worth million words

**Divya Sharan** · 09-10-2013, 05:02 PM

Re: Hilarious Quotes/Pictures/Answers ...

HR Manager in Heaven!!!

One day while walking down the street a highly successful Human Resources Manager was tragically hit by a bus and she died. Her soul arrived up in heaven where she was greeted by God himself.

"Welcome to Heaven," said God. "Before you get settled in though, it seems we have a problem. You see, strangely enough, we've never once had a Human Resources Manager make it this far and we're not really sure what to do with you."

"No problem, just let me in," said the woman.

"Well, I'd like to, but I have higher orders. What we're going to do is let you have a day in Hell and a day in Heaven and then you can choose whichever one you want to spend an eternity in."

"Actually, I think I've made up my mind, I prefer to stay in Heaven", said the woman.

"Sorry, we have rules."

And with that God put the HR executive in an elevator and it went down-down-down to hell.

The doors opened and she found herself stepping out onto the putting green of a beautiful golf course. In the distance was a country club and standing in front of her were all her friends - fellow executives that she had worked with and they were well dressed in evening gowns and cheering for her. They ran up and kissed her on both cheeks and they talked about old times. They played an excellent round of golf and at night went to the country club where she enjoyed an excellent steak and lobster dinner.

She met the Devil who was actually a really nice guy (kind of cute) and she had a great time telling jokes and dancing. She was having such a goo d time that before she knew it, it was time to leave.

Everybody shook her hand and waved goodbye as she got on the elevator.

The elevator went up-up-up and opened back up at the Pearly Gates and found God waiting for her.

"Now it's time to spend a day in heaven," he said. So she spent the next 24 hours lounging around on clouds and playing the harp and singing. She had great time and before she knew it her 24 hours were up and God came and got her.

"So, you've spent a day in hell and you've spent a day in heaven. Now you must choose your eternity,"

The woman paused for a second and then replied, "Well, I never thought I'd say this, I mean, Heaven has been really great and all, but I think I had a better time in Hell."

So God escorted her to the elevator and again she went down-down-down back to Hell.

When the doors of the elevator opened she found herself standing in a desolate wasteland covered in garbage and filth. She saw her friends were dressed in rags and were picking up the garbage and putting it in sacks.

The Devil came up to her and put his arm around her.

"I don't understand," stammered the woman, "yesterday I was here and there was a golf course and a country club and we ate lobster and we danced and had a great time. Now all there is a wasteland of garbage and all my friends look miserable."

The Devil looked at her smiled and said:
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
"Yesterday we were recruiting you, today you're an Employee".

**HyperRetard** · 09-10-2013, 05:06 PM

Re: Hilarious Quotes/Pictures/Answers ...

Posted on the last page itself.

**chaosaddict** · 09-10-2013, 05:13 PM

Re: Hilarious Quotes/Pictures/Answers ...

I am just trying to move on, if you know what I mean!!!

**Divya Sharan** · 09-10-2013, 05:26 PM

Re: Hilarious Quotes/Pictures/Answers ...

Beta - "Mom, Love marriage karne se ghar wale naaraz hote hain kya..?"
.
.
Maa - "Tu zaroor kisi chudail ke chakkar mein hoga, aur ye sab tujhe usi daayan ne kaha hoga....
Ladkiyan to bas ladkon ko phansaane mein hi lagi rehti hain..
Jahan Accha Ladka dekha nahin ki
shuru ho gaye...
Beta in se bach ke rehna.. ye bahut makkaar aur KAMEENI hoti hain, aur inka to khandaan bhi…........"

Beta - "Bas maa, aisa kuch nahi hai,
Wo to Daddy bata rahe the ke Aap Dono ki Love marriage hui thi.."

----consecutive posts auto-merged-----

Amazon's list of funniest reviews:

http://www.amazon.com/gp/feature.html/?ie=UTF8&camp=1789&creative=390957&docId=1001250201&linkCode=ur2&nav_sdd=aps&pf_rd_i=507846&pf_rd_m=ATVPDKIKX0DER&pf_rd_p=1592750982&pf_rd_r=0GZQH2EPG90KPMYY6F0P&pf_rd_s=center-B2&pf_rd_t=101&tag=destinyland-20

**Rakesh Rok** · 09-10-2013, 07:19 PM

Re: Hilarious Quotes/Pictures/Answers ...

how many of you feel the same

. . ?

Cheers!!!

----consecutive posts auto-merged-----

Cheers!!!

**anilp** · 09-10-2013, 07:24 PM

Re: Hilarious Quotes/Pictures/Answers ...

Sardar eats 8 Naans at a party & is suffering from Constipation.

Praying & Crying in Toilet :- Hey Wahe Guru..

Ya to JAAN nikaal de..

Ya NAAN nikaal de...

**siddharthsure** · 09-10-2013, 08:35 PM

Re: Hilarious Quotes/Pictures/Answers ...

Murrica xD

Have you ever been this happy???

Girls..... They are always complicated

**B7ACKTHORN** · 09-10-2013, 09:30 PM

Re: Hilarious Quotes/Pictures/Answers ...

Originally posted by siddharthsure View Post

xD
Have you ever been this happy???

[ATTACH=CONFIG]115861[/ATTACH]

this piece I want!!!

Cheers!
VJ

**aargee** · 09-10-2013, 10:13 PM

Re: Hilarious Quotes/Pictures/Answers ...

Originally posted by petrolhead_chn View Post

***Few Reasons Handguns are Better than Women***

Yea, yea, but there's something that a Woman can do that a hand gun can't

**rreneav1987** · 09-10-2013, 10:47 PM

Re: Hilarious Quotes/Pictures/Answers ...

A man takes his seat at a fifa world cup final.
He looks to his left & notices that there is a spare seat between himself & the next guy.

MAN: "who would ever miss the Fifa world cup final?"

GUY: "that was my wifes seat. We have been to the last five world cup finals together, but sadly she passed away."

MAN: "that's terrible, but couldn't you have brought another family member, friend or someone else with you?"

GUY: "no...they are all at the funeral !"

===

An Indian girl married a Spanish man & went to Spain..
.
.
She can't speak Spanish
.
.
.
.
Each time she wants to buy chicken legs, she would lift her skirt & show her thighs to enable the seller understand her...
.
.
This went on for sometime
.
.
One day she wanted to buy banana...
.
.
She took her husband to the shop..
.
.
.
( Hello Dont Think Dirty Know Why ?? )
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.
Because her husband can speak Spanish and could ask for Banana in Spanish...

===

**psr** · 09-10-2013, 11:16 PM

Re: Hilarious Quotes/Pictures/Answers ...

Originally posted by B7ACKTHORN View Post

this piece I want!!!

Cheers!
VJ

It is the dangerous business end....

**Cleaner** · 09-10-2013, 11:33 PM

Re: Hilarious Quotes/Pictures/Answers ...

Originally posted by petrolhead_chn View Post

***Few Reasons Handguns are Better than Women***

You can trade an old 44 for two shiny new 22s.

It's OK to keep one handgun at home and have another for when you're on the road.

Your primary handgun doesn't mind if you keep another handgun for a backup.

Your handgun will stay with you even if you run out of ammo.

A handgun takes up remarkably little closet space.

A handgun has never asked... "Do these grips make my butt look fat?"

A handgun doesn't mind if you go to sleep after you use it.

AND THE BEST REASON...You can buy a silencer for a handgun.

Are you a gun nut just like me?

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